This Country is a Mess and So Are Our Mega Music Festivals

A short rant on boring bills for festivals I wouldn't attend anyway.

“I think I’m finally too old for festivals.” - my friends after seeing the lineups for Bonnaroo and Coachella.

I received this message in various forms from friends over the past few weeks as some of the summer’s most enormous festival bills were released. “Who are any of these bands?” “How is Machine Gun Kelly headlining Bonnaroo?”

I’m here to tell you that no, you are not too old to go to a festival, and it’s okay if you don’t know most of the bands. I do not have an answer on how Machine Gun Kelly is everywhere (well, I have an idea, but more on that later).

Each year, there is the inevitable chatter when the Coachella lineup drops about how the festival isn’t the same as it used to be. Still, after years of head-scratching through a transitional period, 2022 promises to be the year that the bills are as overflowing with shit as the portapotties during Sunday night’s closing sets.

Let’s take a look at Bonnaroo, who were brave enough to dive in first:

After 2020’s annual outing at The Farm was canceled because of Covid, and last year’s festival fell through because of Hurricane Ida, Bonnaroo should be celebrating its 20th anniversary in a big way. ‘Roo began as a jam band-oriented weekend and maintained that idea, even when mixing indie, electronic, and hip hop acts over the years. But in 2019, mega promoter Live Nation, who spent their previous life as part of Clear Channel before merging with Ticketmaster a decade ago, bought out founding promoter Superfly, and here’s the result. Compare this to the original lineup, or even 2007, the year I attended, which saw a healthy mix of the festival’s legacy acts, along with the most prominent indie names at the time that fit the bill.

There’s no cohesion to this lineup. Sure, there are plenty of great acts from various genres, but by trying to appeal to everyone, this festival appeals to almost no one who wants to attend all four days. Superjam used to be the thing of legends, with Ben Harper, John Paul Jones, and Questlove acting as the house band in 2007 and covering Led Zeppelin, Stevie Wonder, and Jimi Hendrix. It’s no secret that the special occasion has been lacking for some years, and Live Nation’s response is like every other corporation in the industry right now: throw Jack Antonoff at it.

What a bust.

When promoter Goldenvoice announced Coachella’s lineup last week, they at least realized their crowd is influencers that don’t give a shit who’s playing in the background while they knee pop pose for the millionth time. The festival started with more “indie” acts over twenty years ago, often featuring anticipated reunions like Faith No More and Pavement. Ten years on from the infamous 2Pac hologram performance (okay, maybe I am old), Coachella has mostly dropped this theme. Like Bonnaroo, the magic is in the undercard, and I’m not going to say anything about Harry Styles or Billie Eilish, but don’t be surprised when Kanye shows up sometime Monday morning.

So what has gone wrong with the mega American festival?

There are a few things. First is the disappearance of genre themes, which the country, metal, hip hop, and punk circuits are still doing well. Do I want to go to Stagecoach, located in the same place as Coachella? Hell no, but at least Goldenvoice knows what product their demographic is there to see.

When it comes to themes, this past week, the When We Were Young bill blew up older millennial social media by going all out on early-00s emo:

The headliners aren’t my thing, and there’s fun in the undercard (except 3OH!3… why?), but the festival knows precisely who they are appealing to. Take a look at the dates, though, and you’ll see all 60 of these bands are supposed to play in one day. Taking place on three stages and cramming all of this into 18-20 hours sounds like a logistical nightmare, and the $225 price tag would be reasonable if these sets were longer than 20 minutes.

Speaking of logistics, you may have read somewhere that the same promoter is putting on this emo fest as the fateful Astroworld, which saw eight people die. While this is indeed true, I can only say best of luck to the people boycotting because that promotor is LiveNation, as mentioned earlier (who are currently being sued for $2 billion along with Travis Scott and Apple). If you are going to boycott LiveNation shows, you aren’t going to see much as they book for over 150 venues in this country.

Coachella happened first because of Pearl Jam’s infamous boycott of LiveNation parent company Ticketmaster back in 1994. Looking for a place to book in the Los Angeles area, the band took a gamble in Indio, and the success of the show demonstrated that the site in the Coachella Valley was a viable festival spot. Here we are almost thirty years later, and not only is Ticketmaster still running the show, but they are also in charge of booking most of these shitstorm festivals.

It is the other reason these bills have become turdburgers - like everything else in America, corporations dominate the music industry. Thank the Spotify algorithm and the major labels for pushing these artists that draw a big “meh.” It’s the exact reason why Machine Gun Kelly went from a failed hip hop act to a platinum-selling pop punker in two years. The label says you’re going to see and hear him nonstop until beaten into submission.

It’s no wonder why the Pitchfork Festival is a huge deal each year, even if mega-publisher Condé Nast owns them. As one of the only big festivals not run by one of the main promoters, they offer a lineup mostly made of artists you won’t see at these other algorithm-driven weekends.

Most importantly, it’s also why you should support your local festivals sponsored by local companies and brands. When I’ve lived in Denver, there was nothing better than the Underground Music Showcase in late August. Sure, you haven’t heard of 99% of the bands, but it’s a great opportunity to marry touring and local acts, all while providing a great space to walk around and hang out, which should be the festival atmosphere goal.

This also is an American-centric issue, as Europe notoriously does festivals better. Take a look at Primavera Sound in Barcelona, which perfectly combines legacy rock bands, mega huge pop stars, hip hop, and electronic artists.

If you’d rather attend Bonnaroo than this, please let me know why, I’m generally curious how it competes with Primavera’s lineup.

So don’t think you’re too old for live music, just because you don’t know half of the bands on a bill. Instead, remember that these megacorporations will trot out the usual suspects, whether anyone is listening or not.

Give me your favorite festival memory, whether great or miserable!

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