I Guess My Annual Rock Hall Rundown is a Thing Now
Checking in on last year's winners and this year's new noms.
Last year I made it pretty clear that I couldn’t care less about the state of the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame, but the article was popular, and this thing is too much of a trainwreck to look away, so let’s take a look at how it’s going in Cleveland in 2022.
It’s no secret that the Rock Hall™ has been slow to recognize people of color and women in its thirty-eight-year history, and 2021 saw a nominee emphasis on hip-hop, soul, and female artists. This year’s outing continues this trend with some “new” faces, including a female country artist (spoiler: it’s Dolly).
The easiest solution to breaking down the old white dude board barrier is simple: change the name. Rock and Roll is an outdated idea that rejects a large portion of the most commercially successful artists of the seventy years. If they just renamed this damn thing to The Pop Music Hall of Fame, hopefully, we wouldn’t have to have an inclusivity discussion every time the noms are announced.
Let’s revisit last year’s winners, and rank the induction probability for each new artist.
Foo Fighters
What I said last year: I think the first three Foo Fighters albums are some of the best of the 90s (There’s Nothing Left to Lose is criminally underrated), and those records hold a special place in my heart.
I can’t say the same for their last 15 years or so, a continuous feed of formulaic stadium rock written to jack up a football team before the game. They’re still a touring powerhouse and released their 10th album last week, which has generally received positive reviews, but I had to force myself to get through the whole thing. I’ll watch a new interview from Dave Grohl and Co., but it’s just not where I’m at these days.
I’d rather see a Sunny Day Real Estate reunion.
Are they a 2021 inductee? They shouldn’t be, but they usually perform at the induction ceremony every year, and I can see the suits falling for them. I do think they deserve it down the road, but a first-year win would be insulting for so many other bands.
Thoughts on their induction: The Rock Hall™ can talk all they want about diversity, but the Foos getting in on their first year of eligibility was the most predictable outcome from last year. The average wait for an artist’s induction after their eligibility is fourteen years, and these dudes received their entry right away, with none other than Sir Paul inducting them.
A year later, I’m even more burnt out on Foo Fighters, as they have a way of dominating the music press. Reading about Dave Grohl daily isn’t something I’m looking to do, but here we are. It won’t stop in 2022 either - after releasing an EP of disco covers last year, the Foo Fighters are treating us to an unwanted horror movie starring the band later this month.
Gee, can’t wait.
The Go-Go’s
What I said last year: The Go-Go’s were the first all-female group to write a number one album with “We’ve Got the Beat,” which is reason enough to have them in the Hall. The LA punks endured so much sexism throughout their career, including being spit on by white nationalists while touring England. After not being able to secure a record deal, Miles Copeland, manager of The Police, had The Go-Go’s open for Sting and the boys on the massive Ghost in the Machine Tour, and the rest is history.
Are they a 2021 inductee? I hope so. There was nothing else like them at the time, and their influence was monumental for artists like Madonna, Hole, The Breeders, and Best Coast.
Thoughts on their induction: The Go-Go’s are the kind of trailblazers the Rock Hall™ needs more of, and their induction was worth it just for bassist Kathy Valentine to keep the voting board in check during the ceremony:
“By recognizing our achievement, the Rock Hall celebrates possibility, the kind of possibility that creates hopeful dreamers. By honoring our historical contribution, the doors to this establishment have opened wider, and the Go-Go’s will be advocating for the inclusion of more women,” she said. “Women who have paved the way for us and others. Women who started bands, who sing and write songs, who excel on their instruments, who make and produce records. Because here is the thing: There would not be less of us if more of us were visible.”
- Kathy Valentine
Jay-Z
What I said last year: Hova has eleven number one albums and dominated two decades of hip hop. He’s won 22 Grammys and sold over 50 million albums. Jay-Z’s later career has focused on running a sports agency and working with the NFL on their entertainment offerings (I enjoyed The Weeknd’s halftime show, my scientific Instagram poll says my readers did not).
Is he a 2021 inductee? No, because the Hall will have another worthless hip hop debate. I also think many other rappers should be in before him, but Jay-Z unquestionably deserves a spot someday.
Thoughts on his induction: I’m glad I was proven wrong, and the Rock Hall™ voters are finally coming around on hip-hop (more on that in the new noms). There are more compelling rappers to choose from, but it takes star power from people like Jay-Z to break outdated Hall™ norms.
Carole King
What I said last year: Carole King has already been inducted as a songwriter with Gerry Goffin, rightfully so. She’s responsible for “Take Good Care of My Baby” by Bobby Vee, “Chains” by The Beatles, “The Loco-Motion” by Little Eva, “Up on the Roof” by The Drifters, “I’m Into Something Good” by Herman’s Hermits, and my personal favorite “Porpoise Song” by The Monkees.
King’s influence is still felt today. Titanic Rising by Weyes Blood was my favorite album of 2019 and is very much Tapestry for the 21st century.
Is she a 2021 inductee? She deserves to be, and Tapestry celebrated its 50th anniversary this week, which should propel her into the Hall.
Thoughts on her induction: New York songwriters in the sixties established many pop music foundations in the Brill Building, and Carole King was a massively influential part of this scene. King was a great place to start if the Hall™ wanted to include more women.
Todd Rundgren
What I said last year: Though not familiar with “kids these days,” Todd Rundgren is probably the biggest slap in the face to not be in the Hall already. They’ve been uncomfortable with “glam” performers in the past, but T.Rex’s recent induction should help Rundgren.
“Hello, It’s Me,” “Can We Still Be Friends,” and “I Saw The Light” are some of my all-time favorites (thanks, parents), but Rundgren has had such an incredible career outside of these singles. His producing credits include New York Dolls, Badfinger, Grand Funk Railroad, Meatloaf, Bad Religion, and XTC, often finishing songs for the bands without taking writing credits. Rundgren also designed the first color drawing pad he leased to Apple and has been a pioneer in electronics.
Is he a 2021 inductee? Having been eligible since 1996 and nominated for the last three years, Rundgren should finally be recognized.
As Todd Rundgren author Paul Meyers put it:
Thoughts on his induction: Todd was my top pick, and it’s fantastic that he finally made it, even if he doesn’t care. Not only does the Rock Hall™ have a discriminatory history with people of color and women, but there’s a long list of acts that continue to be “too weird” for the voter’s taste. Hopefully, Rundgren’s induction leads to bands like Devo (nominated again this year) getting their due.
Tina Turner
What I said last year: Already inducted with ex-husband Ike Turner, this is the first year Tina Turner has been nominated, and dammit, it took long enough.
Turner is one of the great comeback stories in music history after breaking free of her abusive husband and deserves her solo spot in the Hall given that she’s more known for her solo era at this point. Private Dancer was one of the biggest albums of the 80s, and Turner is definitely at icon status.
Is she a 2021 inductee? The nomination should be a layup for someone to get an induction on their first year of eligibility. I think the Hall views it as a Lifetime Achievement type award and has taken a ton of criticism over the years for not having her.
Plus, she’s “simply the best.”
Thoughts on her induction: Tina Turner is an icon and a classic example of the Hall™ waiting too long to nominate her because she doesn’t fit the stringent rock and roll requirements.
Just call it the Pop Music Hall of Fame already!
2022’s New Nominees Ranked in Order of Probability of Being Inducted
7. A Tribe Called Quest
One of the most influential hip-hop acts of all time, A Tribe Called Quest, helped create the jazz-rap scene by moving away from the classic funk and soul samples that dominated the genre's early days. 1991’s The Low End Theory and its follow-up Midnight Marauders are both as perfect as a record can be, and after an almost twenty-year hiatus, came back and did it again with We Got It from Here… Thank You 4 Your Service.
Hip-hop would not be where it is without Q-Tip, the late Phife Dawg, Ali Shaheed Muhammad, and Jarobi White, but will probably be on the outside looking in with voter’s stale ways - I genuinely hope I’m wrong.
6. Beck
“Soy un perdedor, I’m a loser baby, so why don’t you (vote for) me?”
Beck is one of the most prolific songwriters to come out of the grunge scene, with fourteen records under his belt. At the same time, it has always taken the traditional industry players too long to recognize Beck’s pop genius. Even with his heyday through most of the 90s, it took until 2014’s Morning Phase for him to win the Grammy for Album of Year.
With the Rock Hall™, I’d imagine we’re going to see the same thing. Although he’s one of my all-time favorite songwriters, he doesn’t have the industry sway to get in on the first try.
5. Lionel Ritchie
It’s pretty wild that this is Lionel Ritchie’s first nomination and even crazier that The Hall™ hasn’t recognized his work with The Commodores. The Commodores are Motown legends with seven number one hits and multiple platinum records. Ritchie continued the trend throughout the 80s, dominating the charts with “Hello,” “All Night Long,” and a load of other top ten hits. I can see Ritchie being a safe choice in the next few years, but The Commodores probably deserve to be there first.
On another note, living in an apartment again, complete with a concrete-footed upstairs neighbor, has me fantasizing about jumping into the classic “Dancing on the Ceiling” video.
4. Duran Duran
New wave icons Duran Duran dominated the 80s by being one of the first bands to master the MTV format. Unfortunately, The Hall™ is slow to recognize new wave bands by lumping them in with punk acts.
Will Duran Duran have the same first-year luck as The Go-Go’s? I think they’ll be with Devo on the outside looking in.
3. Eminem
The Rock Hall™ requires twenty-five years since an artist’s debut album to be eligible, and Eminem’s nomination is the epitome of mattdamonaging.gif.
Eminem is this year’s Jay-Z: a combination of commercial success, popularity, legacy, and someone familiar enough for the suits to relate to as they listen to “Lose Yourself” on their Pelatons.
2. Carly Simon
For the Rock Hall™, Carly Simon is the perfect combination of “how are they not in there?” and someone that the older crowd is comfortable voting for.
1. Dolly Parton
The Rock Hall™ is traditionally stingy with country stars and begs the question: if country has its own Hall of fame, do they need to be in Cleveland? I’d argue that the country artists in the Rock Hall™ all embody the rock and roll spirit with Johnny Cash, Hank Williams, and Jimmie Rodgers among the few who are inducted.
There’s also an ongoing theme with the genre that fits most of the others in the Hall™, and it’s that all of the inductees are men. There’s no better candidate to break that trend than Dolly Parton. She’s country music’s Betty White, the kind of person that gets more popular with age, and Dolly is thriving in the social media age.
After thirty years of eligibility, she’ll get a first-round induction. At least I have to think so. We’re a Dolly house, after all.
